


Signal Corps

by Kahika



Series: Relay Monument Incident [3]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Cybersex, Epistolary, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-14
Updated: 2015-07-24
Packaged: 2018-04-09 09:04:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4342442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kahika/pseuds/Kahika
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Garrus changes his mind about not risking Ashley's career (much). As it turns out, she doesn't need to be talked into staying in contact.</p><p>Absence makes the heart grow fonder.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. message chain

**Author's Note:**

> The Explicit rating is for small parts of the second chapter - the first and third are T tops.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> E-mail logs for Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams, stationed at Systems Alliance Rapid Response Base 3.
> 
> "I'm so glad you changed your mind about not staying in touch."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack: ["Living in Your Letters" (unplugged) by Dashboard Confessional](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nDZBpp53WI) and ["Set the Fire to the Third Bar" by Snow Patrol](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfa9yxCpWoA).

**From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** How are you?

Ashley,

In case the e-mail address didn't give it away, it's your cultural exchange/xenobiology research partner. Anderson was at the station the other day so I asked him about the old crew, and he gave me your e-mail address. Figured I shouldn't call, though.

So we're clear, I'm not looking for anything here. Please don't feel obliged to reply. Just wanted to see how an old friend was doing, from the source instead of third hand or however many channels are between you and Anderson. He said you're in the Kepler Verge. You're certainly capable of handling anything out of the Terminus Systems. I hope your new unit's treating you well.

Things have been busy here. There's still a lot of repairs to be done, so there's a lot of displaced and frustrated people. A lot of the arrests these days are just desperate people, not assholes or criminal masterminds. There's no fun in that.

I don't know if you've heard from the others. W and T both made it back home. L mentioned something about going to Omega last time I talked to her, turned me down when I asked if she wanted backup. No idea what she's up to, but I'm worried. Keep an eye out for her if you can.

Miss you.

G

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: How are you?

Hey G,

Thanks for writing. I vidmail Joker sometimes but I hadn't heard from any of you guys. I've really missed everyone. You can tell the others how to contact me if you want, as long as they can get freebie e-mail addresses like yours and they use initials. I'm so glad you changed your mind about not staying in touch.

The new unit's good. My CO hasn't said anything about my family, so I'm definitely not going to bring it up. Some of the squad were actually a little in awe of me because of the whole Battle of the Citadel thing, until a guy I used to serve with broke the ice by making fun of me like the old days. I'd missed him, but I hadn't realized how much.

I like it here. Every time there's an attack on the colonies, we fly out to shoot people in the face. James, the guy from my old unit, was assigned out here long before I joined the Normandy and I was dead jealous of him, but now I get to play cavalry too. Straight up combat's so much easier than chasing a rogue Spectre.

It feels weird sometimes, though. You and I know what's really out there, and here I am focusing on pirates and slavers, while you're going after, what, looters? I'm not SURPRISED that no one listened, but I am disappointed.

Fun must be the wrong word for your line of work, but that sounds really rough. I hope you're relatively safe at home, you're not living in a bad neighborhood or anything. I know you can handle it, but I worry. Any way I can help? You or the displaced. Hard to know which charities aren't scams.

Thanks for the update on the others. I haven't seen L - we never actually go into the Systems, we just have a base out here in the Verge. God, she never would have gone to Omega on her own when we first met her. I'm praying for her. Both her mom and Shepard in such a short amount of time... I hope she finds peace, but I doubt she'll find it on Omega.

Anyways, I should get my duties squared away before dinner. Already got a squadmate staring at me because I've been writing since we got back to base instead of cleaning my rifles like usual, but I'm not a word person. If someone else can't say what I mean for me, it takes me a while to figure out how to say it.

I miss you too.

\- Ash

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Re: How are you?

Ash,

I just noticed there's an M in your e-mail address. What's that for?

"Weird" doesn't even begin to describe it. There was something on the news yesterday about how they haven't found any geth outposts for a month, so we've won. Nothing about Sovereign or the Reapers, of course. Everyone just accepts that statement from the Council a while back saying the attack on the Citadel was just one rogue Spectre and the geth, so unless you're affected by the damage, it's business as usual, or maybe there's a little "War is Over" sale. Even the Avina terminals don't have any information on Reapers. They think the Eden Prime War's over when the real war's only just begun.

I'm not just going after looters. Half the precinct's arrests lately have been people who joined gangs or started dealing drugs to make ends meet, because they've got expensive repairs or higher rent in a new place. The keepers only work so fast. Private repairmen and builders are in high demand and some of them are taking advantage. It makes me sick that it's legal.

My neighborhood's okay. Bachjret Ward wasn't hit too hard in the attack, and I managed to call in a favor to get repairs on my apartment pretty quickly. The worst crime we get here is the odd pickpocket. Writing to you is help enough for me, but I'm sending you extranet links to a couple of charities I've seen on the ground.

I'm glad your new unit's treating you well. Riding to the rescue sounds right up your alley, and it sounds like you already have a friend out there. Every time some new recruit who saw me on the vids gets starry-eyed around me, Executor Pallin starts using me as a "what not to do on a case" story, so you're probably better off with the slight awe and awkwardness. Hopefully your CO doesn't actually care about your family. Surely you and your medals deserve some kind of promotion by now.

For someone who's not a word person, you wrote a longer e-mail than I did. Not that I'm complaining. It's good to hear from you. I sent your address to the others, but don't expect anything from W any time soon. Not sure he'd know how to get an address that isn't from his home planet, and he's trying to stop the infighting at home. Don't tell him I said this, but if anyone can do it, it's him. Still haven't heard from L.

G

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: How are you?

G,

NOW who's military? You told me once that civilians don't believe the enemy's coming until they're there, and now they're gone. Of course people won't believe it. Hell, even here, my squadmates don't believe me that Sovereign wasn't just a ship.

The M's for my middle name, Madeline. They whack your middle initials into your e-mail address in case of any name double ups, so we don't end up ashley.williams25 like you, Mr. rifle-calibrations-422. Cute choice of numbers, by the way.

Always happy to help. I tossed some credits to those charities. Wish I could do more for you. I miss hearing your voice.

About the photo attachment: James caught me writing to you, and when I said it was to an old Normandy crewmate, he got all excited and asked if I could send you a photo of him. I told him that was weird, and he just asked if it'd be less weird if it was a photo with me. Turns out Shepard's his hero, so anyone who worked with her is great in his book too. He just keeps it real with me because we knew each other before. Thank God I'm not some larger than life figure to him.

Although a little girl on this colony we were on the other day asked me for an autograph because she'd seen me on the news from the Citadel attack and the medal ceremony. Felt weird. But I think the occasional starstruck kid, weirded out new squadmates, and a couple of medals is all the promotion I'm ever going to get. If I was ever gonna get a promotion for my service on the Normandy, it would have been on reassignment. I'll never break the Williams curse. That's life.

Thanks for sending my e-mail address along. Nothing yet from W or L like you said, but T's told me very vaguely about her new ship. I'm as proud of her as I would be of any of my little sisters. It's crazy how we all got so close on the Normandy and then completely fell apart after Shepard died. At least some of us are getting back in touch now.

Frigate just landed. Gotta go. Time to kick ass.

\- Ash

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Re: How are you?

Ash,

It's good to see you even in a photo. You look happy. James looks like a human krogan, which are two words I never expected to see side by side. Is that a Normandy badge on his uniform?

Don't feel weird about being a role model for little girls. Better you than someone like Sani Shelani. I hope you gave her that autograph. At least if you're feeling weird about it, that's a good sign you're not going to let it go to your head.

But I'm going to say it again: Apply for Spectre candidacy. The Council won't judge you on your name, just your experience, and the Eden Prime War and the Battle of the Citadel should be excellent experience. Anderson and Udina would probably vouch for you too. Anderson likes you and I'm sure Udina misses having a human Spectre. Here, I got you started, but you'll have to put in your pre-Normandy service record and medical details yourself.

I've found one person who either believes me about the Reapers or is humoring me, and of all people, it's my new partner at work. A human woman named Jordan. The precinct threw her at me 'in the interests of officer safety' because there have been attacks on officers out alone lately, but I'm pretty sure they're just trying to keep me in line. She's very fussy about the regs and paperwork. I think you'd like her.

My sister just called. Mom's deteriorating again so she's back in the hospital. I wish I could do more for her than help pay for the treatments that aren't on her insurance, but I'm not a doctor, let alone a neuroscientist.

Damn, I started this e-mail in a good mood.

G

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: How are you?

G,

I'm really sorry about your mom. I hope the treatments work this time. You know, your sister could probably use you there. I'd go home in a heartbeat if anything happened to my mom, if just to look after my sisters. Wish I could be there for you in person, but you know I'm here for you by e-mail. I'll keep your family in my prayers. Do you guys do flowers? Can you send your mom whatever your culture sends to sick people and I'll pay you back?

Is working with a partner like being in a buddy cop movie? You know, "He's a loose cannon! She's completely by the book! THEY FIGHT CRIME!" Sorry, it's probably not as funny as I'm imagining, and it must be annoying after being used to working on your own. But I'm glad you've got someone to watch your six, and having someone to rein you in is probably good for you considering the first time I saw you you were arguing with the Executor in the Council Chambers. I hope your partner's as fussy about fraternization as I am.

Actually, speaking of cop movies, I saw a trailer on the extranet for a movie about a hanar Spectre. Requiem for a Reaper or something? We should go see it. Well, go see it separately and then write each other angry e-mails about how that's not what being the first Spectre of a species is like and how that's not the Reapers' endgame. I can't believe the first thing to take the Reapers semi-seriously is a hanar Spectre movie.

I also can't believe you started filling in a Spectre candidacy application for me! It's not going to happen. We might have a bit more clout now but the human ceiling's going to be much harder to break than the Williams curse, especially following a commissioned officer with N7 training like Shepard. And by the way, I'm two centimetres taller than what you put in. You're a cop, I thought you're supposed to be good at estimating height!

James kind of acts like a human krogan sometimes. But yeah, he wears a Normandy badge. I feel sick every time I look at it. I always think of the way she looked from the escape pod, all holes and fire and then just pieces.

Great, I just made myself sad. Doesn't help that I've been missing Shepard this week. Give me some good news, Officer. That's an order.

\- Ash

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Re: How are you?

Ash,

That's Agent to you. And I don't have any good news, but what I do have for you is a surprise. Open the file attachment on your own omni-tool, not a work terminal, and use your ear piece. It's just a little something Mom used to read my sister as a bedtime story. Now she sometimes reads it to Mom when she's going in for treatments. That's how I got the idea, actually. Anyway, I hope you like it.

More importantly I hope you're feeling better. I hate thinking of the Normandy that way too. I always try to remember her in her prime. Rescuing us from volcanoes, hanging up on the Council, drunken cultural exchanges by the Mako, that kind of thing.

Working with a partner is nowhere near as hilarious as the vids when you're one of the cops. Jordan's very good with an omni-tool and you'll be pleased to know she saved my ass the other day, but I feel like she's holding me back when it comes to actually making arrests. So no worries about fraternization, if we even had that reg. Anyway, she's married, and more to the point, I'm only interested in one human.

I would love to critique a hanar Spectre movie for historical accuracy with you. When does it come out in your neck of the woods? And have you done anything else on your Spectre candidacy application? Speaking of which, sorry for underestimating your height. My last significant memory of you in person involves you lying down, which doesn't make for the best estimates.

Sis said the same thing about being able to use me back home, but I just feel useless every time I go. I think she saw through me when I told her I was too close to the end of a case. Mom's supposed to be out of hospital next week anyway. I guess that's good news. It means she's not any worse.

We don't do flowers, but I sent our equivalent gift, which is far too specific to our culture for me to tell you about. Told my sister it was from an old squadmate. I don't think she believes me, but Mom liked it, which is the important part. Thanks.

Agent GV

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Sorry

Ashley,

It's been a while since you've written, so in the absence of reports of disasters in the Kepler Verge, I'm guessing that I came on too strong or made you feel uncomfortable. Sorry for my choice in poems, bringing up that time by the Mako and that time in the hotel, saying that I'm only interested in one human, and/or anything else. I wasn't lying when I said I wasn't looking for anything, and I understand why anything more than this would be impossible even if you were still interested. You don't have to write back if you don't want to, just let your e-mail client send back the read receipt.

G

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Read: Sorry

Your message

> To: ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa  
> Subject: Sorry

was read.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Re: Read: Sorry

Understood. I'll stop writing.

GV

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** DON'T STOP WRITING

Sorry about the delay. Two more days and I'll write back, I promise.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Re: DON'T STOP WRITING

These are going to be the longest two days of my life, Williams.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Two days are over!

Gunnery, not C-Sec Officer,

I'm really sorry about keeping you waiting. No disasters, but it's definitely been rough out here. I was planning to finally write back a few days ago but then I sprained my wrist in a fight with some mercs so our CMO didn't want me typing, and I couldn't get the time to dictate anything longer than that last message. (I have the all clear now, don't worry about me making it worse or anything.) Nothing to do with the poem or anything you mentioned in your last full e-mail, I swear. No need for you to apologize.

Because I never stopped being interested. You probably saved my life that night by the Mako, and that hotel room was the only bright spot in that first month after the Normandy went down. Impossible's a good word for us, with what we are and where I am. I'm sorry.

That said, thank you so much for that sound file. I must have listened to it a hundred times while I was stuck on base the last few days. I hadn't realized just how much I missed your voice. The poem's beautiful. That warrior woman sounds like a badass, and I really wasn't expecting it to turn into a love poem in the last few verses. I tried turning my translator off to listen to it in the original language - wow, I don't think I'd ever get the hang of some of those tones or those crunchy consonants, but it was really interesting.

Requiem for a Reaper won't be released here until another month after it comes out in Citadel space, but I've got a squadmate who downloads movies all the time and says he can get a copy off the extranet once it's out there. Well, he told me how to get it too, but I think I've downloaded enough contraband on the Alliance connection lately.

I am not applying for Spectre candidacy! Can you imagine me reporting to the Council? I'd crack up laughing and want to punch someone every time I met the asari Councilor's eye. Now that I've left you with that mental image of why it would be a bad idea, please just drop it. Anyway, what happened with YOUR reapplication for Spectre candidacy? Didn't you put it in around the time of Shepard's memorial?

Good news: Sarah and Thomas set a date! Two years from today. Abby says that's plenty of time for me to find a plus one I wouldn't be fraternizing with, but I'm not interested. I've already got my leave approved. I'm gonna be the only bridesmaid not wearing whatever ugly dress Sar picks out. I'll probably look like I should be on the groom's side - Thomas is military too, and so are most of his buddies (I think I've served with his best man), so at least I won't be the only one in dress blues.

How's your mom? She was supposed to be out of hospital by now, right? Does that mean these last treatments worked? And how much do I owe you?

\- Ash

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Re: Two days are over!

Gunnery Chief (still Gunnery Chief? I assume you'd tell me if you got a promotion) Williams,

Good to know you're alright, both with your wrist and with me. I hope you shot the bastard who got your wrist. Hell, I hope you shot him in the face. I know you like your boomstick.

Knowing that you're still interested makes me feel a lot better about the delay, but perhaps we'd be better off not discussing this further, before we start to want too much.

You're welcome for the poem. I'm glad you liked it. Deciding on something to record you was a good distraction. We've got this drug smuggling case and a name from an old case of mine came up. Drives me insane that after Dad let him go last time, he's still out there. Jordan probably won't let me go after him either. I'm this close to quitting.

My reapplication for Spectre candidacy is in, "thank you for applying" letters and all. Radio silence since. It probably didn't help that I can't really get references for my work on the Normandy, and with my methods C-Sec's never going to give me a reference.

Let me know when you get the movie and we'll set a date. I won't see it until you've got it so I don't accidentally spoil you.

Having a date for the wedding's exciting. Will Sarah be dragging you into helping out with prep work long distance, or do you get to just show up for the rehearsal and the big day? I just realized I've never seen you in a dress, but I'm sure you could make even an ugly one look good, considering how nice you look in Alliance dress blues. Abby's right, though, you should definitely bring a plus one. Some nice human guy you can vidmail on base. You deserve someone like that.

Mom's okay. She's back to how she was before this latest round, which wasn't great, but it's better than a new, worse normal. I called her the other day and actually got her on a good day. That is, she knew who I am, even with the low res vidchat and S's bad speakers. Your prayers and gift must have helped.

Wishing I was still Gunnery Officer,

G

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Two days are over!

Always Gunnery Officer to me,

I'm so glad your mom's alright! You must be thrilled about talking to her on a good day. Seriously, let me pay for the present. You're paying for the treatments, it's the least I can do.

Embarrassingly, the merc didn't intentionally get my wrist. I just landed badly when a Singularity I was stuck in detonated. But James threw a frag grenade at her anyway. I think I actually said "you should see the other girl" to our CMO. Asari mercs are the worst.

Officially I only need to come to the rehearsal and the big day, but I'm definitely expecting some "lilies or daisies" e-mails, and Sar wants me to give a speech at the reception. I don't actually know Thomas that well. Hopefully we get assigned to the same place at some point, otherwise I'll have to see if he's as good a penpal as you.

I don't want to bring a nice human guy to the wedding, or one to vidmail on base. Of course, abuela would probably disown me if I brought a bad boy like you. I think she'd be more okay with seeing T or L (have you heard from L?) at her granddaughter's wedding. She took what happened to Granddad and then to me and Dad really hard. Every time she talks about my time on the Normandy she pities me for having to work with aliens.

Do you want me to write you a reference for your Spectre application? I outranked you, and it'll look good coming from someone with medals.

Why wouldn't Jordan let you go after the smuggler if he's part of your case? Anything to do with your methods that C-Sec wouldn't write you a reference for? And if you leave your job, what are you going to do? "I'll go home and visit my family" is the only acceptable answer here.

This photo's really old but senior prom's the last time I can remember wearing a fancy dress. It's been dress blues ever since I enlisted. I'm proud to wear the uniform but I wish I had more opportunities to wear dresses, I think I look pretty damn good in them. Hope you wanted to know what I looked like as a teenager...

Probably won't ever make Operations Chief but you'll be the first to know if I do,

\- Ash

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Good text chat last night

Best way to end a day. We should do that again some time when I'm more awake. You know which part I'm talking about.

CO says I handled myself fine in the interview, so thanks for the pep talk. I'll let you know when it airs.

Looking forward to those books.

x

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** (no subject)

I quit C-Sec. Found the smuggler.

I might not write back for a while.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re:

You idiot. What do you mean, you might not write? How long is a while? Don't do anything stupid.

I'm praying for you.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Hello?

Are you in jail for killing the drug smuggler or something??

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** What are you doing?

Two weeks is plenty of time for me to find something on the extranet about a former cop now in jail himself. I'm sure C-Sec would try to cover it up but Emily Wong wouldn't miss a scoop like that.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Vids

Bilal said Requiem for a Reaper leaked onto the extranet. The whole squad's watching it this weekend after our Battlespace feature airs. You still in?

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Vids

Requiem for a Reaper was the most inaccurate "inspired by real events" war movie I've seen in years.

I'm glad the Battlespace didn't use much of my interview, but there was some great footage of me shooting things.

Write back. Watch the vids. I need someone to complain to about the movie. The squad wasn't on the Normandy and Requiem's not T's kind of movie. You don't have to tell me how great my hair looked in auto-matte, though, my sisters already took care of that.

You know what? I don't even care if you see the vids. Just tell me what's going on. If you're in trouble, I want to help.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** One month

You're freaking me out here.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Where are you?

A month and a half, seriously? You're the one who panicked and said you'd stop writing when I didn't write back for about a week and then called a two day wait the longest of your life. Is this your idea of 'a while'?

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** AYNSWER ME

Two moknths. BASTAARD. I'M out heore protectieng the innocent anxd crap but lal I can thinvk aboupt is rowrying werhe the hell you are and what happenetd to you. I didn't fuck you and take alkl those mepds just because your'e a good kissoer, ui did it bjecausE i care about you. We may have broken uap before we ever even started doating bzut fuckm, I miss pyou enough to wdrite you even width your stupid freebsie e-mail anxd initials for names and sefl osnecring. yit's still a risk for me, hte names of hte whole damn squad are omn pulbic record. Syo you don'nT GETto reestablish contact just to orpd fout of contact rihsgt after quittikng your job, what thfe FGUCK.

FUZCK YOU, YJOU SOZN OF A BITCH. I Shulod rahve ljoved sa thunderbird instead; at letsa when spring comes they roavr back again.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Sorry

I'm really sorry about that last e-mail. James got reassigned and I guess I had too many too quickly at his goodbye drinks last night. If your translator can even handle that level of drunk typing, don't bother reading it.

Seriously, though. Answer me.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Please?

Garrus, it's been three months. Tell me you're still alive.

If it's anything I said, I'm sorry. Just... please write back. Hell, you can even vidmail me. I just need to know you're okay.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Please?

The following address(es) failed:

rifle-calibrations-422@bachjretward.citadel.civ.pub  
No Such User Here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashley's drunk e-mail was run through [the Zantherus Drunk Post Translator](http://www.zantherus.com/fun/drunkpost.php), which is why some of the typos look extremely unlikely. But who knows what future keyboard layouts are like?
> 
> Her quote is from ["Mad Girl's Love Song" by Sylvia Plath](http://allpoetry.com/Mad-Girl's-Love-Song). "Dad loved all those sappy poets. Mom was more into Plath."
> 
> [Ashley was busy when she got the "omg did I make u uncomfortable" e-mail](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4519896/chapters/10282107), and [James was with her when she sent the drunk one](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4519896/chapters/10321239).


	2. chat transcripts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lonely night on the Citadel and Ontarom, the night before Ashley's "good text chat last night" e-mail.
> 
> "Does the Alliance read this channel?"
> 
> "(...) Why?"
> 
> "I was just wondering what you're wearing."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Despite the cybersex tag, it's actually very little of this chapter.
> 
> Soundtrack: ["Untouched" by the Veronicas](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykW4rtW2eu0).

> **G V** (Location: Citadel)  
>  **Ashley Williams** (Location: Ontarom)

**G:** You know, I was starting to think you didn't know how to use your text chat program.

 **A:** Are you this nice to all the girls you chat with?

 **G:** Only the badasses.

 **A:** Ha!

 **A:** But is this really the first time we've caught each other?

 **G:** I think so.

 **A:** I pretty much only get online to chat to my sisters. Time difference between here and Amaterasu is so weird we have to try and schedule chats.

 **A:** Just finished talking to Sarah. It's pretty late here now. I was about to go to bed.

 **G:** Oh, I won't keep you.

 **A:** I said 'was'. I'll stay up a little longer to talk to you. I'm not one of those people who doesn't like to use their omni-tool in bed.

 **G:** Only if you're sure.

 **A:** I'm mostly off-duty tomorrow anyway. Just got an interview in the afternoon.

 **A:** I was gonna put on your sound file, but I'd rather talk to you live.

 **G:** Are you using it as a bedtime story?

 **A:** Sometimes, but I listen to it a lot anyway.

 **A:** I think I have the translation memorized now.

 **A:** Haven't got the words of the original down but I know when you change verses from when your voice changes.

 **A:** Did you mean it?

 **G:** Yeah.

 **G:** Figured I could pass it off as just an old feminist ballad if you took it the right way and didn't approve.

 **A:** Okay.

 **G:** You're okay with that?

 **A:** I don't want to talk about it.

 **G:** Understood.

 **A:** Because we'll want too much.

 **G:** Oh!

 **G:** Right. Not talking about it.

 **A:** Other people talk about it enough anyway. The whole squad likes to mock me about always writing my boyfriend. "Vidmail exists, Williams!"

 **G:** I write at home, but every time your e-mails come in when I'm at work, Jordan laughs at me. Says I don't stop smiling for the rest of the day.

 **A:** Apparently I do that too. Might be how they jumped from "friend" to "boyfriend".

 **G:** Even my sister teases me now, since you sent something to Mom.

 **A:** I thought you said it was from an old squadmate?

 **G:** I did. But I actually don't usually tell old squadmates about family stuff, and she called me out on it. Said the old squadmate must be someone special.

 **G:** She's not wrong.

 **A:** How much was the gift, anyway?

 **G:** You're not going to drop this, are you?

 **A:** No. Let me pay. I'm the one who wanted to send something.

 **G:** It was only 1000 credits, but fine.

 **G:** E-mailing through my bank account number now.

 **A:** Good.

 **A:** Speaking of e-mail, it's your turn.

 **G:** I know. So I don't want to bring up anything I was going to write about.

 **G:** Well, maybe just one thing.

 **G:** That high school photo? Adorable.

 **G:** I'm sending it to the others.

 **A:** Don't you dare!

 **G:** I'm sure T will love it, at least. W will probably laugh his ass off.

 **A:** Ugh, I knew sending it to you was a bad idea.

 **G:** Damn, I wish I knew where Joker was posted so I could send it to him too.

 **A:** He's grounded. He was too pissed off to tell me why.

 **G:** What kind of military gives a man a medal and then grounds him?

 **A:** I know. It's not fair.

 **A:** Tried to distract him by inviting him to the wedding. He sent me a vidmail of just him laughing, then said he'd go IF I press his dress uniform for him again.

 **A:** It's kind of tempting. Mostly to shut Abby up about me bringing a date, but also because he might make the reception hilarious.

 **A:** Oh yeah, speaking of the military, do you get the Alliance News Network?

 **G:** Yeah. I love the Battlespace.

 **A:** Great, because they're doing a feature on us!

 **G:** What? You're going to be on TV?

 **A:** I don't know WHEN, but we've got cameras following us around this week.

 **G:** Is this what the interview's for?

 **A:** Yeah. There's a few of us getting interviewed, me and a couple of the officers who have been here the longest. They pushed me forward for it because I helped fight Saren.

 **A:** Doesn't feel right. I don't have my commission, I'm a FNG, and I've already set a new record for time from first ride out to first injury. I just happened to bring a couple of medals.

 **A:** One of which I only got because I was lucky.

 **G:** Ash. Allow me to indulge in a little cultural exchange here. The kind kids go off-world for, not our euphemism.

 **G:** My people are taught from birth that if even one person is left standing at the end of a war, then the fight was worth it.

 **G:** The same thing goes for a battle.

 **G:** Your fight was worth it. YOU are worth it.

 **G:** You held your own against an ambush from an enemy you weren't trained for.

 **G:** A pretty woman with a camera is just one more.

 **G:** You deserve this. You've got this.

 **A:** Thanks. I mean it.

 **G:** So do I.

 **G:** Just don't say anything horribly offensive and you'll be fine.

 **G:** You'll at least look good no matter what you say. You don't need the auto-matte cameras they use.

 **A:** Okay, now you're just flirting.

 **G:** I'm just stating facts.

 **A:** I don't actually watch much Battlespace myself. They try to sex up the war and it's weird.

 **G:** I just watch it for the articles.

 **A:** That's what the guys say about reading Fornax.

 **G:** Really! Last night there was a story about how they're developing new gun tech based off some of the geth guns we sold back to the Alliance.

 **A:** Man, that requisitions officer we had onboard must be making a killing.

 **A:** Wait, no. He didn't make it to an escape pod.

 **G:** We never found him.

 **A:** Damnit.

 **A:** What geth tech are they using?

 **G:** Did you notice some of the guns had detachable heat sinks instead of cooldown systems?

 **A:** Oh, yeah.

 **A:** Damn, I was hoping for plasma.

 **G:** Still sore about Virmire?

 **A:** Always sore about Virmire.

 **G:** Are you okay?

 **A:** Yeah. Cleared my compulsory psych eval.

 **G:** Those can be faked.

 **A:** It was five hours long and right after we got back to the Citadel from the attack on the Normandy. I wasn't in any state to fake anything.

 **G:** Ah. What you didn't want to talk about once you came back.

 **A:** Yeah. Obviously I passed, somehow, since I'm back out on active duty.

 **G:** That was a while ago.

 **A:** Okay. Fine.

 **A:** It wasn't my fault, Sovereign's an asshole, I shouldn't question my superiors' orders, Kaidan and my dad probably gave Shepard and the requisitions officer and everyone else a great welcome in Heaven anyway, more than one person was left standing so it's worth it, etc etc.

 **G:** You're forgetting one part.

 **A:** Oh yeah.

 **A:** I'm alive.

 **A:** And I'm never going to understand it, but I'm okay with it.

 **G:** Good.

 **A:** I like my life.

 **G:** Better.

 **A:** For the most part, I love my job. How many people can say that?

 **G:** I certainly can't.

 **A:** My squadmates are great.

 **A:** My CO recommended me for certification in specialized ammo.

 **G:** Congratulations! Do you get to choose which kind?

 **A:** Anything but incendiary because James is certified for it. I obviously picked disruptor.

 **G:** Obviously.

 **A:** My baby sister's getting married and I'm gonna be a bridesmaid.

 **A:** Despite being a Williams I have these two shiny medals, one of which I actually feel like I deserve.

 **A:** I have you.

 **G:** Yeah.

 **A:** And I wouldn't have all of this if it wasn't for Shepard making the call and Kaidan giving his life.

 **A:** Is that what you wanted to hear?

 **G:** Only if you believe it.

 **A:** I do.

 **A:** Just realized it now, but I do.

 **G:** Okay. That's really good, Ash.

 **A:** Your turn.

 **G:** What? I don't get a turn.

 **G:** I'm not the one who told their CO they should have been left to die and then told someone they were making out with that they should be dead.

 **A:** So? I like hearing about your life.

 **G:** Okay, fine.

 **G:** I have a couple of buddies at work who feel similarly about the red tape.

 **G:** My mother recognized me two vidchats in a row.

 **A:** That's amazing!

 **G:** I've got you.

 **G:** It could be worse.

 **A:** I can't believe it.

 **G:** Sorry my life's not as good as yours right now.

 **A:** You make me sound like an optimist.

 **G:** I don't have a lot to be optimistic about.

 **A:** I'm sorry.

 **G:** But I can cope.

 **G:** Like I said, writing to you helps.

 **G:** Might be the only thing keeping me sane right now.

 **G:** I hate this case. I hate Jordan. I hate the bureaucracy.

 **G:** Every time we manage to make a nice legal arrest, three more similar cases pop up. It's worse than it was before the attack.

 **G:** I don't know why Shepard thought I could still do this.

 **G:** I could probably do more on my own.

 **G:** Please, change the subject before I blurt out something classified. I just typed my perp's name and had to catch myself before I sent it.

 **G:** Did you fall asleep on me?

 **A:** Nah, I was just looking up those heat sinks.

 **A:** I don't think they'll catch on.

 **A:** I mean, those guns we sold back to requisitions didn't have cooldown packs.

 **G:** Supposedly if you're fast enough, it's more efficient than waiting for the cooldown.

 **A:** You've just gotta get into the rhythm of it, that's all.

 **A:** Weird that this is geth tech. It sounds like something a wuss who can't handle a hot gun in their hand would come up with.

 **A:** If you've gotta replace the heat sink every time one gets hot, you might as well go back to limited ammo.

 **A:** I've been with the Alliance seven years and in that time I've replaced an ammo block once.

 **A:** Heat sinks would be like using my grandfather's antiques where you always have to reload your rounds.

 **A:** Pretty sure those were HIS grandfather's guns.

 **G:** I love it when you talk dirty to me.

 **A:** Guns are dirty talk to you? They were the first thing we ever talked about one on one.

 **A:** We used to argue over who got the new toy every time Shepard popped open a weapons locker or got back with loot.

 **G:** I didn't think of it like that back then, just since the Mako.

 **G:** Besides, you literally just said something about handling a hot gun. Innuendo much?

 **G:** Actually, does the Alliance read this channel?

 **A:** Probably. I mean, I don't think they look at our comms live unless we use a flagged keyword or something, but they might skim the transcripts later.

 **G:** Okay.

 **A:** Why?

 **G:** I was just wondering what you're wearing.

 **A:** Really?

 **G:** Sorry. Too much.

 **A:** No, I'm just surprised. You really weren't kidding about liking me talking guns.

 **G:** I was a little.

 **G:** But is it too much?

 **G:** What are we even doing here?

 **G:** Is talking about sex fine even though we're not talking about other things?

 **G:** Is this a dumb idea on a military channel?

 **A:** No, I've caught other people cybering on the Alliance connection before.

> Ashley sent IMG_0149.jpg.

**G:** Good photo.

 **G:** Your hair's getting long.

 **A:** What are YOU wearing?

 **A:** Don't send a picture, obviously.

 **G:** Sweatpants. Gloves, visor.

 **G:** Are we really doing this?

 **A:** Yeah.

 **A:** No shirt?

 **G:** I just got out of the shower. Still hot.

 **A:** Mm, I bet.

 **G:** Hey, is James okay?

 **A:** Yeah, why?

 **G:** You just came onto me. I have to assume someone died.

 **A:** Not funny.

 **G:** Sorry.

 **A:** Colors?

 **G:** Gunmetal blue sweatpants.

 **A:** So they match your eyes?

 **G:** I guess.

 **G:** It was a bit hard to tell from the selfie - are you in bed?

 **A:** Yeah.

 **A:** Hard as the Normandy bunks but at least I have my own room and it's not on shifts.

 **A:** You?

 **G:** Sitting on my bed at home.

 **G:** Not as soft as that hotel's beds.

 **A:** We never tried out yours.

 **G:** Because T was there and then I moved into your room.

 **G:** I didn't notice a difference anyway.

 **A:** Wait, are you working today? Don't want to make you late.

 **G:** Day off.

 **G:** I'd stay anyway. Jordan can suck it up.

 **A:** Always gotta mention another girl.

 **A:** Hello?

 **G:** Sorry. Just thinking about the last time I mentioned another woman while you were in bed.

 **A:** I've been thinking about that time too, and I think in another hotel room or your apartment I'd want to do things differently.

 **G:** How so?

 **A:** Ever had a blowjob?

 **A:** You're looking it up, aren't you?

 **G:** Yes, I am.

 **G:** No, I haven't.

 **G:** Teeth.

 **A:** Transcript.

 **G:** I didn't describe them.

 **G:** I can be careful when I'm horny.

 **A:** I know.

 **A:** I wish you weren't. I like it when it hurts.

 **A:** Are you still wearing those sweatpants?

 **G:** Not any more.

 **A:** Good. Gloves now.

 **G:** I need them to type.

 **A:** Damn.

 **A:** Visor?

 **G:** Ash, my written translator feeds into my visor and I only know two words in English, one of which I really hope you're not going to use.

 **A:** Okay, keep it.

 **A:** I'm trying to come up with a way to use the word "funeral" in cybersex now.

 **G:** Please don't.

 **A:** Fine. That probably would have gotten sad and weird anyway.

 **G:** I think all of our real life encounters can be described as "sad and weird".

 **A:** Exactly. No need to add a sad and weird fantasy. Cybering itself is probably sad and weird enough.

 **A:** You still wearing your underwear?

 **G:** About to take it off.

 **A:** Leave it.

 **G:** What?

 **A:** Leave it on, because I would.

 **G:** Oh you tease.

 **A:** Yup, sure am.

 **G:** What else would you do?

 **A:** First I'd run my hands up you, nice and slow like a rifle.

 **G:** I used to watch you clean your rifles. Up until the crash.

 **A:** I know.

 **G:** I knew it!

 **A:** I don't stick my rifles in my mouth, though.

 **G:** I've seen porn like that, and as much as I like women with guns, I don't get it. That's not safe!

 **A:** I mean I'm pretty sure they're unloaded but I don't get it either.

 **G:** Didn't these people ever learn you never point a gun at someone unless you mean it?

 **A:** And you especially never stick them in every orifice!

 **G:** It's not sexy, it's dangerous.

 **A:** You're sexy AND dangerous but SEX AND GUNS SHOULDN'T MIX.

 **G:** Unless you get attacked in the middle of sex.

 **A:** Where the hell have you been having sex?

 **G:** I haven't since you left, but hypothetically.

 **G:** We've shot people in some very pretty places.

 **G:** You remember the Vamshi stars in the Armstrong Nebula?

 **A:** One little blue one and a big red one?

 **G:** That's it.

 **G:** I'd take you back to Maji and we'd have sex with that view of the binary stars.

 **A:** You didn't go to Maji. I did. It was way colder than Noveria, and L said you spent all of Noveria complaining.

 **A:** And the radiation's awful if you're not in a hardsuit.

 **A:** So, we'd die.

 **G:** Killjoy.

 **G:** Fine. We'd have sex in the Mako, looking out the window.

 **G:** And halfway through we'd get attacked by pirates from the Terminus Systems, but we'd be fine because we have the cannons.

 **A:** Perfectly calibrated.

 **G:** Exactly.

 **G:** Wonder where the Mako is now.

 **A:** Shepard's probably driving it up some mountain in Heaven.

 **A:** Goddamnit, we were supposed to be cybering.

 **G:** At least I was still talking about sex.

 **A:** Have you ever cybered in your life? You can't just leave it at "we'd have sex with a nice view and the Mako cannons".

 **G:** Have YOU? You're the one who brought up what a miserable excuse for a planet Maji is.

 **A:** Point taken.

 **A:** I just scrolled up. You're the one who got distracted critiquing gun porn.

 **G:** Damn, I am.

 **G:** So if not rifles, what would you stick in your mouth?

 **A:** Well, nothing yet.

 **A:** I'd just slowly lick the head of your cock, through the fabric, until it's soaked through.

 **A:** And then I'd wrap my lips around you and sink down, centimetre by centimetre.

 **G:** I just thought you should know that my imagination is supplying all the details you're leaving off the transcript.

 **A:** Good, because I'm definitely thinking about all those details.

 **A:** How damn good they'd feel in my mouth.

 **G:** New euphemism?

 **A:** I think so.

 **A:** Are you touching yourself?

 **G:** Yes.

 **A:** Good.

 **A:** I don't think I'd get very far, actually. You're a weird shape.

 **G:** YOU'RE a weird shape.

 **A:** We're both weird shapes. This was never supposed to work.

 **G:** But it does.

 **A:** Yeah.

 **G:** So, short and shallow, then.

 **A:** Short and shallow but still slow, until you're so hard it hurts and you're begging me to take off your underwear because you want to feel my mouth on you.

 **A:** Take it off.

 **G:** Gone.

 **A:** But you wouldn't get to feel my mouth on you just yet, because I'd lick you first. Up and down, every single detail, until you're slick and every breath against you is cold.

 **G:** TEASE.

 **A:** I didn't hear you complaining in the hotel.

 **G:** Not complaining. Stating a fact.

 **A:** That's fair.

 **A:** You wouldn't be able to state anything when I slide my mouth over your cock. You'd just be gasping, because you've never felt this before, and I've had some damn good performance reviews.

 **G:** But I'd be holding onto you. I'd dig into your shoulders, run my hands through your hair.

 **G:** Take your braid out.

 **A:** Working on it.

 **G:** I like it down.

 **A:** You've said before.

 **A:** Okay, it's out, it's all wavy now.

 **G:** Like when we saw off Tali?

 **A:** Yeah.

 **G:** Oh, that was nice.

 **A:** Thank you.

 **G:** Hair confuses me.

 **A:** And yet you have a preference. That's kind of cute.

 **G:** I try.

 **A:** So you're running your hands through my hair as I let you fuck my mouth, best we can with the mismatch. Quick now, because I've been teasing you long enough.

 **A:** You're driving into my mouth so hard I've gotta hold your hips down so you don't choke me.

 **A:** But every once in a while as you enter my mouth I'll just stop and suck.

 **G:** hsezclw

 **A:** Remember when I was sucking other sensitive spots? Like that.

 **A:** Hello?

 **A:** Ah. I'm guessing from that keysmash that you came.

 **A:** That good?

 **A:** Damn.

 **A:** I wasn't even done.

 **A:** Don't tell me you fell asleep.

 **G:** Got some on my gloves, had to clean them off before I could type.

 **A:** Not a sexy detail, G.

 **G:** God, Ash. Never say you're not a word person again.

 **G:** Wait, did you say ther'es more

 **A:** You'd come in my mouth, hello.

 **A:** And I'd keep sucking on you until you're all dry, and then I'd sit up, look you in the eye, and swallow.

 **G:** No, don't do that. Spit it out. I looked this up.

 **A:** Transcript.

 **G:** There are other reasons to spit. Apparently some people don't like the taste?

 **A:** OH. Yeah. I don't mind it.

 **A:** I wish I could find out what you taste like.

 **A:** I bet you'd taste good.

 **A:** I love the way you taste when I kiss you.

 **G:** Me too.

 **G:** I mean, I love the way YOU taste when we kiss.

 **A:** Do you even have anyone else to compare it to?

 **G:** No. You're the only woman I've ever kissed.

 **G:** The only woman I want to.

> Ashley sent IMG_0152.jpg.

**G:** I obviously need to say things like that more often if it's making you smile like that.

 **G:** Wait. I don't see straps on your shoulders. When did you take your shirt off?

 **A:** A while ago.

 **G:** Are your shorts off too?

 **A:** And my underwear.

 **G:** How come I had to wait until you let me take my clothes off and you got to strip off when you felt like it?

 **A:** Because you're the one who gets off on orders.

 **G:** I do not get off on orders.

 **G:** I was in the military too.

 **G:** And think of how awkward it would have been on missions. "Go snipe that merc up there." "Can it wait a bit? I just came in my armor."

 **A:** Haha!

 **A:** In bed, I mean.

 **G:** Okay, maybe a little.

 **A:** It's hilarious.

 **G:** It's only hilarious because you're military.

 **A:** Probably.

 **A:** Okay, if anything comes out weird, I just switched to dictation mode, but I'm whispering because it's past lights out and our walls aren't what I'd call soundproof.

 **A:** At least it's just me in my block of two tonight. The girl I share a bathroom with is on leave.

 **G:** Why are you dictating? I thought you got the all clear on your wrist.

 **A:** I got the all clear for going out on duty but it still aches sometimes.

 **G:** Did you just aggravate an injury by masturbating?

 **A:** No! Oh my god! Probably just all the typing today.

 **G:** Sorry.

 **A:** I made a choice. I don't regret it.

 **A:** But damn, I can't believe you'd think that of me. I'm gonna use my other hand.

 **A:** I'm not an idiot.

 **A:** I don't want to go to my CMO all, hey, my wrist hurts again. Oh, what did you do to it? Fingered myself a little too hard while cybering my uh.

 **G:** Your old squadmate.

 **A:** Wish this wasn't text. I forgot to put in the speech marks, and I just did the best impression of our CMO.

 **G:** Voice chat?

 **A:** I've got an allowance for out of system voice or vid sync. Used it up already. And I think that's monitored too.

 **G:** Of course.

 **G:** Wait, you weren't masturbating just now?

 **A:** Not much. Mostly just while I was waiting for you to clean your gloves.

 **A:** I was writing more than you, remember.

 **G:** True.

 **G:** You should do it now.

 **G:** Just your thumb on your clit. Easy. Gentle. Up and down.

 **G:** Like how I'd use the tip of my tongue on it if I was there with you.

 **A:** Mm god

 **A:** Damn, dictation was a dumb idea, it's going to transcribe all my sex sounds now.

 **G:** Wish I could hear you instead of reading it and imagining.

 **G:** Also, don't you dare speed up.

 **G:** Nice and slow.

 **A:** Oh...

 **G:** You can widen up if you want. Change the shape a bit.

 **G:** People say to do the alphabet but which alphabet? I'd rather just swirl my tongue over you, undefined.

 **A:** Faster.

 **G:** No.

 **A:** What?

 **G:** No, I'd go slow.

 **G:** You'd be bucking into me, your hands on the back of my head, your thighs around my head.

 **G:** Makes it a little hard to breathe but it's hot.

 **G:** And I'd hum. Remember that vibration in a voice like mine?

 **A:** Shit, Gar

 **G:** TRANSCRIPT

 **A:** I know. That's why I stopped.

 **A:** God, I hate this.

 **G:** Me too.

 **G:** But one day I'm going to make you scream my name instead of whispering it and cutting yourself off.

 **A:** (inaudible)

 **G:** Going to have to repeat that for me, Williams.

 **A:** It was a whimper, okay? Can't translate a whimper.

 **G:** Mm, no. I think I understand that loud and clear.

 **G:** Hm. Oral sex is kind of like one-sided kissing, isn't it? No wonder I got the hang of kissing so quickly.

 **A:** It's not mass effect field generation. No need to gloat.

 **G:** It certainly generates my mass effect field.

 **A:** What else does?

 **G:** The way you sound in bed.

 **G:** I've been hard again since you complained about your omni-tool picking up your sex sounds, just imagining everything you're sending out loud.

 **A:** (inaudible)

 **G:** What now?

 **A:** I was just laughing. Silently.

 **G:** Were you giggling the entire time you were typing?

 **A:** Not the entire time! Mostly just at sex in the Mako.

 **G:** Don't tell me you haven't thought about it.

 **A:** We almost had sex up against the Mako. Hard not to think about it after that.

 **A:** It was just the way you wrote it.

 **G:** Okay, I demand a second shot at cyber Mako sex.

 **G:** Hell, a cyber shot at sex up against the Mako, since you turned that into making out on the floor instead.

 **A:** You liked it.

 **G:** Mm. You on top.

 **G:** After that, I wasn't really expecting the hotel to go the way it did.

 **G:** Not that I was expecting the hotel at all, mind.

 **A:** Yeah, I don't usually spend so much time on my back. I guess I go all squishy and submissive when I'm upset.

 **G:** You were pretty upset by the Mako.

 **A:** Upset and sober and interested and about to leave someone.

 **G:** I'm not complaining. You're very cute squishy.

 **G:** That little squeak when I shoved you down after your declaration of sober lust. Adorable.

 **A:** Ugh, shut up. I'm not cute. I'm badass.

 **G:** You're both.

 **G:** The way you had me on that tire was pure badass.

 **G:** But you know I can give back.

 **A:** Mm.

 **G:** My hands rough on your breasts, your waist.

 **A:** What is it with you and my waist? I swear you like it more than my boobs.

 **G:** Cultural thing.

 **A:** I thought so, but I couldn't look it up.

 **G:** Also, your abs.

 **G:** Your skin is so soft but damn, your muscles.

 **A:** Solid steel.

 **G:** Even with my limited knowledge of human anatomy that sounds highly improbable.

 **A:** Haha, metaphor.

 **G:** Oh.

 **G:** Well, they are hard, I'll give you that.

 **A:** Harder than you.

 **G:** Debatable.

 **G:** But with you straddling me, you'd feel it.

 **G:** Every little movement up against your clit.

 **G:** Go faster.

 **A:** God, yes

 **G:** And I'd bite down your neck, my hands on your hips, holding you tight on my lap.

 **G:** Because no matter how wet you are, no matter how much both of us want it, I'm not gonna let you ride me just yet.

 **A:** Hahahahahahaha

 **G:** I hope you didn't just wake up the base by cackling.

 **A:** No no, that was all breath, haha

 **G:** What's so funny?

 **A:** Sorry, uh. You remember a couple weeks ago when you freaked out worrying you came on too strong and said you'd stop writing?

 **G:** How could I forget?

 **A:** Your e-mail came right after I'd just gotten off to your voice, imagining riding you. I got interrupted trying to write back in dictation mode.

 **G:** You use me reading that poem as masturbatory material?

 **A:** Sometimes.

 **A:** Sorry?

 **G:** No, it's fine. I just didn't know you liked my voice that much.

 **G:** And I'm never going to be able to listen to that poem again without getting hard.

 **A:** It's not even the poem, mostly. It's you. Sometimes I switch off my translator just to listen to you in your native language because you sound so good in it.

 **G:** Mostly?

 **A:** I switch back to English when it starts getting romantic.

 **G:** Ah.

 **A:** Yeah.

 **G:** I know you said you didn't want to talk about it but I just have one question.

 **A:** Yeah?

 **G:** Do you feel the same way, or am I coming on far too strong?

 **A:** (inaudible)

 **G:** Ash?

 **A:** In me all that fire is repeated, in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten.

 **G:** Is that from a poem?

 **A:** Other people say what I mean better than I do.

 **A:** It's by Pablo Neruda. Look it up.

 **G:** So can I assume the rest of the poem also applies?

 **A:** Yes.

 **G:** Okay.

 **A:** Can we please talk about something else? I'm getting sleepy and I don't want to fall asleep sad because of what I can't have.

 **G:** Do you want to finish what we were doing?

 **A:** No, I'm not in the mood any more.

 **G:** Seems a bit unfair after I got off earlier, but okay.

 **A:** Still there?

 **G:** I'm reading some other poems by this Pablo Neruda. He's not bad, though I bet I'm missing something in translation.

 **A:** Look for his stuff in Spanish if you can, so you only get it translated once instead of twice.

 **A:** He's one of my favorite poets that I came to on my own, not because of my parents.

 **G:** Your parents are/were into poetry too?

 **A:** Dad more than Mom. He liked the sappy poets. Always recorded me reading his favorite when he'd ship out.

 **G:** Can you record something for me?

 **A:** You just want something to get off to.

 **G:** It's only fair.

 **A:** Heh.

 **G:** I miss your voice too.

 **A:** I'll think of something. I'll record it when I'm more awake, though.

 **A:** How'd you even decide to record me a poem, anyway?

 **G:** You said you missed hearing my voice, so I wanted to record something, but I didn't want to just read an e-mail because that would get old fast.

 **G:** I wanted to say how I felt about you but I didn't want to scare you off.

 **G:** And then I remembered you reciting a poem in the elevators after Shepard's memorial, and you mentioned in the hotel that you read poetry, so I thought I'd hide it in something you'd like.

 **A:** Clever.

 **G:** I thought so, until I realized there's a lot of love poetry out there.

 **A:** (inaudible)

 **A:** Silent laughing again.

 **G:** Shut up, it wasn't ever something I'd really looked into.

 **G:** Then Mom ended up in hospital and I remembered that one my sister reads her.

 **A:** Well, I love it.

 **G:** Good.

 **A:** It's nice to get a glimpse of your culture. Since I can't really look it up.

 **G:** We're going to do more actual cultural exchange one day.

 **A:** Look at you, turning into an optimist.

 **G:** No, just dreaming.

 **G:** When do you get shore leave?

 **A:** We get a couple of days here and there, but nothing long enough to come out to the Citadel for more than a few hours.

 **A:** My mandatory week off doesn't come for another few months.

 **G:** Any plans?

 **A:** Same as always. Go home.

 **A:** Mom would worry if I broke routine.

 **G:** One day you'll get an actual boyfriend and really freak her out.

 **A:** Ha, yeah, right.

 **A:** What about you, any plans to go home? It's only the next relay over, right?

 **G:** Yeah, it is.

 **G:** But I don't know.

 **G:** Dad retired, about the time I was deciding to stay with the Normandy until we'd wiped out those last geth.

 **G:** So he'd be there, and... I haven't spoken to him in months.

 **G:** I'd go there for Mom and we'd just end up arguing about C-Sec bureaucracy and whether or not the war's over.

 **A:** You don't think he'd believe you?

 **G:** He thinks like a cop. A better cop than me. He'd want proof. And besides our testimonies, that's a little thin on the ground right now.

 **A:** Ugh, I'm sorry.

 **G:** It's just one more crappy thing in my life.

 **G:** You're the only one I talk to about this stuff.

 **G:** I've got a couple of workmates I complain to about cases or the war, but I don't tell anyone else about family.

 **A:** Yeah, well, you're the only person still alive I've talked to about the way I've been treated because of my family.

 **A:** James has seen it happen, but we've never actually discussed it.

 **G:** Let me guess, the other person was Shepard?

 **A:** And Kaidan. He made that, that's awful but I'm too polite to say it to you instead of the people who did it face.

 **G:** I miss him.

 **A:** Me too.

 **A:** I'm thinking of going for Infiltrator training.

 **G:** You want to switch specializations?

 **A:** Or just add skills.

 **A:** Everyone says it's over but I just know there's more out there.

 **A:** I can't lose another friend, another unit.

 **G:** That's why you're going for disruptor ammo.

 **A:** Also, that tactical cloak they're working on sounds fun.

 **G:** I can send you books on basic programming if you want, get you started on the way to sabotaging everything in sight.

 **A:** That would be amazing.

 **G:** Might take me a few days. Basic was a long time ago for me and the code will have been updated.

 **A:** Take all the time you need.

 **A:** You're the only person I've told.

 **A:** I don't want to be sent back to psych.

 **A:** And everyone would be like, Ash, you're a musclehead soldier, you can barely find a song you like on the extranet, you won't be able to hack.

 **G:** I think you can do anything you set your mind to.

 **A:** You're sweet.

 **G:** No, you're just stubborn.

 **A:** Way to kill the moment.

 **G:** I mean it. You're so stubborn you'll be calibrating GARDIAN lasers in no time.

 **A:** The day I calibrate a GARDIAN laser is the day the Reapers learn to love.

 **G:** There's a terrifying thought.

 **G:** "Your words are as beautiful as your hair. I am the vanguard of your affection. This exchange is over. Kiss kiss kiss!"

 **A:** Haha, you just made it worse!

 **G:** Consider it payback for ruining my Normandy simile.

 **A:** I have to admit, that one was good.

 **G:** I try.

 **A:** Oh shit, I just saw the time. My interview's in twelve hours.

 **G:** You should have told me what time it was over there. I would've sent you to bed hours ago.

 **A:** I was already in bed, remember?

 **A:** Anyway, I really should go.

 **G:** Yeah. Good night, Ash.

 **A:** And you have a good day, okay?

 **G:** With this good a start to my day it's all bound to go downhill from here. You've ruined me for today.

 **A:** It's your day off. Go do something fun.

 **G:** I'll try.

 **G:** Sleep well.

 **A:** Thanks.

 **A:** x

 **G:** x?

 **A:** It's a kiss. Look at it, it's lips.

 **G:** There are actual graphics for kisses and you go for x?

 **A:** I'm old fashioned.

 **G:** x

 **G:** Cultural exchange.

 **A:** Haha.

 **A:** Seriously, good night.

 **G:** Sweet dreams.

 **A:** Wish you were here.

> Ashley has signed off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashley quotes ["If You Forget Me" by Pablo Neruda](http://allpoetry.com/If-You-Forget-Me).


	3. personal correspondence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> E-mail and chat logs for Garrus Vakarian on Omega and then on the Normandy SR-2.
> 
> "This user has been reassigned. Please contact their commanding officer for their current e-mail address."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I was having trouble with this chapter to the point where I decided to just post the pre-Omega stuff. But then Jeb's comment wondering if Garrus got back in touch made me go back and try to fix it and I'm pretty good with it now.

**From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** Ashley Williams  <ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Hey

Ash,

Sorry it's taken so long to write. I didn't realize six months had gone by. It's been crazy. I moved to Omega just hoping to take out that drug dealer at the source, but it's chaos here, so many people taking advantage of the helpless.

I'm trying to make a difference. Without bureaucracy and red tape in the way, I really think I can make things better. I'm forming a team, like the Normandy all over again, and I'm giving them hope. We're called Archangel. I think Shepard would be proud. I hope you are.

How have you been? I hope I haven't worried you too much. How was your Battlespace feature? Have you started working on disruptor ammo yet? Have you gotten a promotion?

We should still see that movie. It's out here, so it must be out over there on the edges of the Terminus System.

I saw on the Battlespace that the Alliance is trialling detachable heat sinks in the field. Have you gotten to try them? They sound awful but I'm morbidly curious.

Love,

G

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@rrb3.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Hey

The following address(es) failed:

ashley.m.williams@rrb3.mil.sa  
This user has been reassigned. Please contact their commanding officer for their current e-mail address.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@gunnerychief.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Trying this again

Ash,

I tried to write you a few days ago but it bounced because I had your old address. Hopefully this one works. I've seen generic position e-mails in our C-Sec contacts.

I'm on Omega. I tracked that drug smuggler's supplier here and wanted to cut it off at the source, but there's so much more to do. My people call this place the world without law and I've never heard a more fitting name. But this is what I became a cop for: righting wrongs, standing up for the innocent. I haven't had a purpose like this since the Normandy.

I hope you're doing well. I hope your new assignment is just as satisfying as your last one. I hope your new CO looks at you and not your family history and I hope you like your squad.

That's a lot of words to say I hope you're happy.

I really hope I haven't worried you too much. I'm sorry I didn't write until now. I never meant to hurt you.

Love,

G

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Trying this again

The following address(es) failed:

ashley.m.williams@gunnerychief.mil.sa  
The subdomain you have requested does not exist on this server.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Tali'Zorah vas Neema  <tali.zorah@neema.flotilla.hea>; Urdnot Wrex <wrex@urdnot.clan>; Liara T'soni <liara_tsoni@armali.thessia.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Ash

Anyone know where she's been reassigned?

G

 

 **From:** Tali'Zorah vas Neema  <tali.zorah@neema.flotilla.hea>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Ash

She didn't tell you?

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Tali'Zorah vas Neema  <tali.zorah@neema.flotilla.hea>  
**Subject:** Re: Ash

I don't know, she might have tried, but she only had my Citadel address.

So? Do you know?

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@ward38.amaterasu.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Third time's the charm?

I hope I got the right number ward. I remember it was 30 something.

There's nothing like trying to guess someone's personal e-mail address to make you realize how little you know a person. I know a lot of things you like, but which ones are important enough to you that you'd identify as them for an e-mail address? The Alliance? Boomsticks? Paragade? Pablo Neruda?

I hope you forgive me for taking so long to write you so I can find out.

Love,

G

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@ward38.amaterasu.civ.pub>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Third time's the charm?

The following address(es) failed:

ashley.m.williams@ward38.amaterasu.civ.pub  
No Such User Here

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Tali'Zorah vas Neema  <tali.zorah@neema.flotilla.hea>  
**Subject:** Re: Ash

Is not telling me your long distance equivalent of "I have a shotgun"? Come on, Tali. Don't make me beg.

 

 **From:** Urdnot Wrex  <wrex@urdnot.clan>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Ash

No idea. I guess I don't kiss well enough for her to tell me.

And neither do you!

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Urdnot Wrex  <wrex@urdnot.clan>  
**Subject:** Re: Ash

Do krogan even kiss?

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** <david.anderson@citadel.council>; <david.e.anderson@captain.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Information request

Dear Councilor Anderson,

My name is Garrus Vakarian. I served as Gunnery Officer under Lieutenant Commander Shepard aboard the SSV Normandy during the Eden Prime War last year. I hope you're doing well.

I'm trying to contact an old Normandy squadmate of mine, Gunnery Chief Ashley Madeline Williams. You were kind enough to give me her rrb3 e-mail address some time ago but it seems she's been reassigned. Would you happen to know the e-mail address for her current assignment, or her generic address?

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

Garrus Vakarian

 

 **From:** David Anderson  <david.anderson@citadel.council>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Information request

Mr. Vakarian,

Alliance officers don't receive generic e-mail addresses until they receive their commission; that is, they reach the position of Second Lieutenant or higher. These addresses start at 2ndlieutenant.mil.sa and go up.

Chief Williams' current assignment is classified, so unfortunately I can't give you her current e-mail address.

I can tell her to contact you, but otherwise I'm sorry I can't be of more help.

Regards

David Anderson

Citadel Council  
Systems Alliance Navy

This email or attachment(s) may contain confidential or legally privileged information intended for the sole use of the addressee(s). Any use, redistribution, disclosure, or reproduction of this message, except as intended, is prohibited. If you received this email in error, please notify the sender and remove all copies of the message, including any attachments. Any views or opinions expressed in this email (unless otherwise stated) may not represent those of the Citadel Council.

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** David Anderson  <david.e.anderson@citadel.council>  
**Subject:** Re: Information request

Councilor Anderson,

Thank you for your very kind offer, but that won't be necessary. I wouldn't want to bother her, or you, more than I already have.

Sincerely,

Garrus Vakarian

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** <jeff.moreau@flightlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Long time no see!

Hey Joker,

I know we haven't really talked since you were reassigned, but with Shepard and the Normandy's anniversary coming up, I got to thinking about the old crew, so I thought I'd see how you're doing. I heard you got grounded? That's rough. I hope you're back on a starship bridge now.

Since we all split up I've ended up on Omega, trying to clean up the station. It's almost like being with Shepard again, working with a multispecies team without rules and regulations to hold me back.

By the way, speaking of a multispecies team, you haven't heard from Williams recently, have you? I've been wondering what our old post-crash CO's up to now.

G

PS: What's the first order an Alliance Commander gives at the start of combat?

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@flightlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Long time no see!

The following address(es) failed:

jeff.moreau@flightlieutenant.mil.sa  
No Such User Here

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@arcturus.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@czarnobog.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-elbrus.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-everest.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-fuji.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-kilimanjaro.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-shasta.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-tai-shan.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-budapest.mil.sa>;<ashley.m.williams@ssv-geneva.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-hyderabad.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-london.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-manila.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-new-delhi.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-perugia.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-shanghai.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-tokyo.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-agincourt.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-ain-jalut.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-hastings.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-leizpig.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-trafalgar.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-benjamin-davis.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-einstein.mil.sa>; <ashley.m.williams@ssv-hawking.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** (no subject)

> Draft discarded.

 

 **From:** Urdnot Wrex  <wrex@urdnot.clan>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Ash

Better than turians!

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** <karin.chakwas@major.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Catching up

Hello Doctor,

I know we haven't spoken since Shepard's memorial, but with her anniversary next week and my new multispecies team struggling along trying to treat each other, I thought of you. I've always appreciated how you took treating even me and Tali in stride.

Just thought I'd see what you're up to now. You're a damn good doctor, better than some of the turian GPs I've had. The Alliance must be putting you to good use somewhere.

Also, have you heard from any of the other humans from the Normandy recently? Particularly Williams or Joker. I can't seem to get their e-mail addresses right.

Garrus

 

 **From:** Karin Chakwas  <karin.chakwas@major.mil.sa>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Catching up

Thank you for your e-mail. I am currently on an extended leave of absence. For urgent matters, please contact Dr. Belinda Hērangi.

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** Erash Pragsarr  <aratech_297@tuhidistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Personal favor

Hey Erash,

I was wondering if you could do me a favor, nothing Archangel related. I've seen you get into all the gangs' systems and Afterlife's records - do you think you could get into the Alliance Navy's personnel files? I'm trying to reach

> Draft discarded.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** How long does the Alliance take to promote their soldiers?

I looked up the rank structure. Surely you deserve your commission by now. A few months ago Anderson told me your new assignment was classified, so that must mean it was important. I started trying your name against all the Alliance ships and stations I could find on the extranet only to realize that the bases wouldn't all be online and dozens of return to sender e-mails would have been even worse than one.

If you HAVE been promoted and you get this e-mail, I swear I'll explain everything. Why I dropped out of contact, why I'm writing from an Omega address now. Give me a chance to apologize and make it up to you. Because I'm doing great out here. I have a mission, I have a team, I even have a base. I just miss you.

I looked up your Battlespace feature. They didn't show nearly enough of you, but from what they did include, you were well spoken and a hell of a shot. Also, you looked damn good. Not that you needed auto-matte to look like a dream.

Love,

G

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: How long does the Alliance take to promote their soldiers?

The following address(es) failed:

ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa  
No Such User Here

This message originated from an Alliance military network. It has been censored at transmission source for security purposes. Any reply may be read by military authorities.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Family

Ash,

I know it's been a while, but you don't happen to have a relative named Gus who's involved with the wrong people on Omega, do you? I'm told Williams is a fairly common surname among your people, but I thought I'd make sure.

Love,

G

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Family

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ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa  
No Such User Here

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 **From:** Tali'Zorah vas Neema  <tali.zorah@neema.flotilla.hea>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Ash

Sorry this took so long! I was away from the relays.

I had her next assignment after rrb3 but she's been reassigned again. You'd think someone who transfers that often would have a personal account somewhere.

You'd better find out where she is. You thought I was worried about you? She was REALLY torn up, kept asking if I'd heard anything.

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipritine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Tali'Zorah vas Neema  <tali.zorah@neema.flotilla.hea>  
**Subject:** Re: Ash

Spirits, why do you think I'm trying to reach her??

Anyway, what had you away so long? If you can talk about it.

 

 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** I'm just going to keep trying every so often

Ash,

It's me. Your rrb3 e-mail address bounced and Anderson wouldn't give me your new assignment, so I'm just hoping they'll promote you up to something with a generic address.

I'm sorry for dropping out of contact. I moved to Omega and things got a little crazy, but now they're a whole lot better. Better than they were on the Citadel. This place was just what I needed. The only thing missing from my life now is you.

Love,

G

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: I'm just going to keep trying every so often

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ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa  
No Such User Here

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 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Two years since the crash today

I'm thinking of the team. Thinking about Shepard and how she held us together.

Thinking of you.

G

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Two years since the crash today

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ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa  
No Such User Here

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 **From:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**To:** <ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**Subject:** Loose ends

Ash,

Sorry if anything comes out weird. I'm using dictation mode and it's pretty noisy.

It's the end of the line for me. With my luck this probably won't reach you, but I had to at least try to get through to you.

I just wanted to say I love you. I shouldn't have let myself lose contact. Who knows, maybe you would have kept my head on my shoulders and I wouldn't have gotten myself, my team into this mess.

Ten people, Ash. Ten out of twelve, and the eleventh is the one who betrayed us. It's not as many as the 212, but this was my fault, and that's not survivor's guilt talking.

I don't know if your prayers reach turian heaven or just human heaven, but pray for me.

Yours,

Garrus

 

 **From:** Mail Delivery System  <Mailer-Daemon@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa>  
**To:** G V  <rifle-calibrations-422@kimadistrict.omega.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Mail delivery failed:returning message to sender

This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.  
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Loose ends

The following address(es) failed:

ashley.m.williams@2ndlieutenant.mil.sa  
No Such User Here

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 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipitrine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Commander Shepard  <shepard@normandy-sr2.cerberus.priv>  
**Subject:** Old squad

Shepard,

Has the Illusive Man told you anything about where the rest of the squad is these days? I've fallen out of touch with them in the last few months and I don't even know if the e-mail addresses I have for them would work any more.

G

 

 **From:** Commander Shepard  <shepard@spectre.citadel.council>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipitrine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Old squad

Garrus,

Use my Spectre e-mail. I don't trust the Cerberus accounts. I'm guessing that's why you're using a Palaven address.

They couldn't find you after you went to Omega so I don't know how reliable the rest of this is:  
\- Ash: Still with the Alliance. Operations Chief now. Anderson says she's on a "special mission" but can't tell me anything because I'm with Cerberus.  
\- Liara: On Illium. Cerberus thinks she's working for the Shadow Broker.  
\- Tali: We actually ran into her on a human colony a few weeks ago, trying to find a kid lost on his Pilgrimage. Seems like she's doing well.  
\- Wrex: Hasn't left Tuchanka in over a year. Trying to unite the krogan clans.

Hope that helps.

Shepard

This email or attachment(s) may contain confidential or legally privileged information intended for the sole use of the addressee(s). Any use, redistribution, disclosure, or reproduction of this message, except as intended, is prohibited. If you received this email in error, please notify the sender and remove all copies of the message, including any attachments. Any views or opinions expressed in this email (unless otherwise stated) may not represent those of the Citadel Council.

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipitrine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Commander Shepard  <shepard@spectre.citadel.council>  
**Subject:** Re: Old squad

Shepard,

It helps. Thanks.

Sorry about Liara. You think you know a person, and then they go off and work for the Shadow Broker. No wonder she was the first to stop writing.

G

 

 **From:** Commander Shepard  <shepard@spectre.citadel.council>  
**To:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipitrine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**Subject:** Re: Old squad

You know, that's what people say about us working with Cerberus.

Sorry about Ash.

This email or attachment(s) may contain confidential or legally privileged information intended for the sole use of the addressee(s). Any use, redistribution, disclosure, or reproduction of this message, except as intended, is prohibited. If you received this email in error, please notify the sender and remove all copies of the message, including any attachments. Any views or opinions expressed in this email (unless otherwise stated) may not represent those of the Citadel Council.

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipitrine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Commander Shepard  <shepard@spectre.citadel.council>  
**Subject:** Re: Old squad

They're wrong.

I'm not sorry about Ash. She deserves that promotion. Hell, she deserves more than just one rank up. The Alliance doesn't appreciate her enough.

 

 **From:** Garrus Vakarian  <garrus.vakarian@cipitrine.palaven.civ.pub>  
**To:** Kasumi Goto  <kasumi.goto@normandy-sr2.cerberus.priv>  
**Subject:** So I hear you can hack anything

Ms. Goto,

Have you ever hacked the Alliance?

> Draft discarded.

 

> **Commander Shepard** (Location: Normandy SR-2)  
>  **Garrus Vakarian** (Location: Normandy SR-2)

**G:** You're right behind me. Why did you ping me?

 **S:** Ash is on Horizon.

 **S:** Thought you'd want to know before we go down there.

 **S:** Keep walking. Grab your gear.

 **S:** Don't let this be a distraction.

 **G:** Thank you.

> Garrus has signed off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Except for the e-mails to Joker and Chakwas, those aren't the only e-mails Garrus sent to the squad, just the only ones Ash-related. (Or that started Ash-related. Thank you, Wrex.)
> 
> [Ashley's perspective on Horizon](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4519896/chapters/10282743). [The first part of this](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4519896/chapters/10282002) occurs right after Horizon.


End file.
